Mercy and Grace During Infertility

“So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.” – Hebrews 4:16

When you spend a lot of time in the online infertility community, you start to notice a theme among all the blogs and tweets: envy and a need for grace.

So this verse struck as me as especially poignant when I read it this morning because it offers encouragement for anyone experiencing either of those challenges.

“So let us come boldly..”

When we talk to God, we can be be confident in our approach. We don’t have to worry about whether or not He’ll accept us or our prayers; He tells us to be bold.

“…we will receive His mercy…”

In the context of this verse, mercy isn’t referring to relief from suffering or pain. It’s referring to the forgiveness of our sins. I don’t believe it’s wrong to feel a sense of inner struggle or conflict when we are faced with babies and pregnant women around us. However, when left to fester, this struggle can turn into envy and envy is sin.

Some people might not agree that envy is sin. But surely we can all acknowledge that infertility can bring out the worst in us. We’ve all felt moments of shame after acting harshly toward our spouse or being rude to someone who made an insensitive comment.

The good news is that God is offering us his mercy and his forgiveness. Infertility is already a heavy load for us to carry, but we don’t have to worry about carrying sin or shame on top of it.

“…we will find grace to help us when we need it most.”

God promises us grace when we need it most. But what is grace?

It’s actually a gift or a blessing from Jesus. Some translations of the Bible use words like “credit,” “favor,” or “concession.” One Bible commentary says that grace is “God freely extending” and “reaching /​ inclining” Himself towards his people.

Could you use a blessing or some favor from God during your struggle with infertility? I know I could.

Let’s make sure we understand that there’s no promise the blessing will be in the form a baby. But we can be sure that He will give us what we need when we need it.

Maybe it’s patience when your husband refuses to get a sperm analysis.

Maybe it’s compassion when a friend complains about their pregnancy.

Maybe it’s peace when the money has run out.

Maybe it’s true joy when your much-​younger sibling announces her honeymoon pregnancy.

Maybe it’s wisdom as you consider adoption.

Maybe it’s comfort when your treatment fails.

Maybe it’s love as you deal with your unsupportive in-​laws.

Whatever you need, you can be confident that God hears you and will only give you the best when you approach him.

What blessing do you need from God right now? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.

This post originally appeared on Amateur Nester.  

About Lisa Newton

Lisa Newton lives on the Central California Coast with her husband, Tom, and their cat, Hemingway. She started blogging at Amateur Nester as a means of coping with multiple failed infertility treatments. She tries to be honest and realistic about infertility while keeping a positive perspective and focusing […]

Read More


  1. Thank you for sharing this blog. I have been going through infertility treatments for several years due to my husband's male factor infertility. We have waited, hoped, prayed, spent a ton of money, time, pain (those shots and the physical toll on your body), been through the emotional struggle and nothing has worked. Two weeks ago, our IVF failed and we lost our embryos. We have no more financial resources or spare embryos. I am at a loss of what to do. I only want a baby with my husband. I would be so happy with one baby. And I prayed and prayed and begged and prayed and cried and prayed. I stayed positive and hopeful. And nothing worked. I feel hopeless at this point I will ever be pregnant and never saw my life this way. I understand what you mean about envy but I am more sad and angry when I see women who are pregnant or who have kids. I see women with 3+ kids and think "I would be happy with 1 God, just 1." Then I see women who never wanted kids get pregnant, women who abort their babies, or women who neglect their children. I see it so easy for most women. And I do not understand God in all this. I am afraid I may never have that experience in my life and my husband is devastated he cannot give me that as easily as any other man and may never be able to. I don't hear or feel God. So I struggle to ask God for a blessing or to ask for anything. Verses say He knows the desire of our hearts and if we ask we receive…I don't believe that. I want to believe He will be faithful but I actually do not feel anything but alone and abandoned and deeply sad. But I just browsed the web and came across this and I thank you because you nailed so many points I have struggled with regarding infertility and do not feel so alone in the struggle. Thank you.

  2. i want to thank Mama Jaja for what she did for my family. I and my husband have been trying to conceive for the last 5 years. We tried everything possible for me to conceive but nothing worked. I read an article of a lady who the Sorceress mama jaja helped to conceive and i contacted her. I told her of all the things i and my husband have done to get a child. She told me to calm down that everything will be fine. She perform a spiritual spell for me to bless my womb. Four weeks after the spell, i went for a test and found out i was pregnant. Now i am four seven pregnant. I am so happy and would want other women or families who need a child to contact the mama jaja, she will certainly help you.

  3. I’m Mercy brown by name I have a few testimony to share with you all about myself, I was in a relationship with this guy and for 3years and we were about getting married when we both have misunderstanding with each other and he ask me for a divorce and we both agreed and after 4months I head that he was having an affair with one of my closest friend and I was very upset and worried so a friend of my advice me and told me if I still love my ex and if I really want to have him back so I told her yes, and she ask me to contact Dr. Madurai the spell caster and I did although I never believe on spell so he gave me something when he was casting the spell and ask me to say my wishes on it and after the casting of the spell a receive a phone call from my ex and was ask me at which I did and now we are back together again I’m so happy and I wish not to ever have this mistake again in my life. I will also advice anyone with this kind of issue to contact him for help he is really nice on phone and always there to answer you question giving you the good advice that you need. his email is

  4. my doctor had told you to forget about having a child at my age and that
    I should have considered adopting a baby, but instead I took matters into
    my own hands and researched and found this
    Web page>> http://​tinyurl​.com/​p​u​t​uash
    I have soon found it to be a treasure that I could refer to repeatedly. The clear cut logical yet compassionate approach that tackles infertility from a totally different perspective had captivated me. I have followed your 5 step recommendations and after less than 3 months of trying, I finally succeeded in my long and painful battle. I am going to have a child. I have no words to express my gratitude.

  5. Hi i am Nombuso Madiba,i never thought they will be a genuine spell caster on the internet after wasting my money searching for a spell that will bring my man back.Though separated but not divorce,until i came across this great man(Dr Buzugbe),who cast a spell that brought my man back in less than 24hrs after 3 years of break up.
    He is powerful and genuine,contact him on or +2348167759906. web:(http://​mashspelltemple​.wix​.com/​m​y​site)

  6. For Real How to get your ex lover back and be happy again, My Name is Bartley Whitley I never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once when i went to Indian in June last year on a business summit i meet a friend of mine called Mariana she introduce me to a man called Dr Shiva at that he can help me get my lover back, Dr Shiva is powerful he could help you cast a spells to bring back your love s gone misbehaving lover looking for some one to love you bring back lost money and magic money spell or spell for a good job am now happy & a living testimony because the man i had wanted to marry left me 4weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down because our relationship has been on for 3 year i really loved him, but his mother was against me and he had no good paying job so when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him at first i was undecided, skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try and in 6 days when i returned to back to Canada my boyfriend (is now my husband ) he called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married i didn’t believe it because the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid and my husband also got a new job and our lives became much better in case anyone needs the spell caster for some help contact him today via his email address at: Or Check Out His Web site at http://​hinduspelltemple​.wix​.com/​h​i​n​d​u​s​p​e​l​l​t​e​mple

Speak Your Mind