9 Ways to Improve Your Marriage

Have you ever wondered how to improve your marriage?

I am sure that most couples go through seasons in their relationships in which they ask themselves a similar question. Seeking out that question’s answer can provide a plethora of different suggestions. Yet how many of those are long-​​lasting, positive solutions?

I believe the best answers to some of life’s most important questions are found in God’s Word, which is full of wisdom and insight that transcends time and culture. God’s Word is relevant, and His answers provide long-​​lasting, positive solutions!

When I was searching for a way to improve my marriage, I was led to a particular passage of Scripture. The verses I read did not scream “DO THIS FORBETTER MARRIAGE . . .,” and there were no flashing signs directing my discovery. Rather, the Holy Spirit guided me as I read, helping me apply what I found directly to my marriage.

Are you ready for it?

9 Ways I Am Learning to Improve My Marriage

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-​​control.” (Galatians 5:22 – 23)

These 9 fundamental character qualities are produced by the divine presence of the Holy Spirit actively working in one’s life. By intentionally applying these “Fruits of the Spirit” to marriage as the standard by which I interact with my husband on a daily basis, I have experienced the blessing of growth in my relationship.

1. Love—love your husband unconditionally! For a great description of how God defines love, check out 1 Corinthians 13. It will require you to have grace, forgiveness, sacrifice, and respect for your husband. Love is foundational, and how you love has an incredible impact on your marriage.

2. Joy—this has everything to do with attitude! Double– and triple-​​check your attitude throughout the day. It is unnecessary to respond to your husband from a heart of frustration caused by something unrelated to him . . . for if it happens, tension is sure to grip your relationship. Allow joy to flow from your heart and bless your husband.

3. Peace—there are many ways we can promote peace in marriage. One vital way is through our responses to our spouse. Choose to be a peacemaker through all your actions, and be intentional in being at peace with your husband.

4. Patience—patience can sometimes require quite a lot of restraint and control, but the more we practice it, the more easily it will come. Have patience with your spouse and learn to slow down.

5. Kindness—a great way to show kindness in marriage is through random acts of service toward your spouse. Seek ways to meet his needs before a request is even made.

6. Goodness—goodness is found at the core of your will. It should be what inspires you to follow through with the rest of these fruits of the Spirit. Be the good you desire to see in your marriage!

7. Faithfulness—this is vital! Strive to be a faithful woman in your relationships with God and with your husband. Faithfulness is believing in the power of God to see positive change in your marriage, it is hope for better days, and it is loyalty to commitments made.

8. Gentleness—this fruit can obviously be seen through physical touch. Physical intimacy is a key element for a thriving marriage. Initiate gentle touches often! Also be aware that gentleness is evident through your responses to your spouse, much like some of the other fruits.

9. Self-​​Control—practice self-​​control in everything you do. This is a very powerful characteristic to have, one that is required if you are working toward improving your marriage. Controlling your body, actions, and words determines the direction of your marriage, and it is necessary to be able to consciously practice all the other fruits of the Spirit.

With this list, please pray and ask the Holy Spirit to help you grow in these areas as you apply them to your marriage.

I also encourage you to read God’s Word consistently to find even more Scriptures revealing what God has called us to do in marriage. You will discover amazing verses that are great to cling to for comfort and support when facing different seasons in marriage.

If you are looking for a helpful resource to guide you through God’s Word, visit faithlifebible​.com/​j​e​n​s​mith, and get your free copy of the Faithlife Study Bible today using coupon code JENSMITH!


Read more on cultivating a godly marriage:

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About Jennifer Smith

Jennifer Smith is a young wife determined to disband the popular lie that women are alone in their struggles.  She believes that the power of transparency in testimonies feeds people’s hopes and starves their fears.  Her passion for missions, writing, and […]

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  1. PrDama Sellers says:

    what great wisdom.

  2. so proud of you babe :)).

  3. Amanda Kay Muscatell says:

    such wonderful tips! Thanks Jennifer! love your blog :)

  4. Fantastic Post! Love each and every point! So true!

  5. I'm so thankful the Son sent the Spirit to join me to Christ so I will have all Christ's resources for this high calling. Jesus, help me to walk in the Spirit!

  6. Victoria Watkins Sgro says:

    Such simple tips that mean SO much. It's amazing how these 9 things can show such strong, powerful love to another person. I need to work on this more…thank you for your posts.

  7. Erin Epting Campbell says:

    I have a very selfish question: What about me? I am patience, and kind of word, and practice HUGE amounts of self-​​control. I do love my husband, but this unconditionally stuff — especially when it's all me giving and all him taking, is really getting to me. I need the same thing. I need patience, and love, and self-​​control from him. I need lots of touches and signs of love and affection. Is it all just for him?

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  9. Patty Myers says:

    I agree.…there's a limit to this unconditional stuff before you feel used, abused and a door mat for the "stuff" a boot stepped in.

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  12. i am hear to give testimony of how i got back my husband, we got married for more than 2 years and have gotten two kids. thing were going well with us and we are always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treat me and the kids. later that month he did not come again and he called me that he want a divorce, I asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying that he want a divorce and that he hates me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do,i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. I contacted Drehiaghe for the return of my husband to me, he told me that my husband have been taken by another woman that she cast a spell on him that is why he hates me and also want us to divorce. then he told me that he have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, he cast the spell and after 3 days my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he settled to apologize on phone and said that he still love me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that the Drehiaghe shrine casted on him that made him come back to me today,me and my family are now happy again today. thank you DR.ehiaghe for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want
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  13. Hello there! When i was reading your blog, it gives me silence in a while to try to contemplate the things that i have in my marriage. I am thankful and feeling bless to hear an inspiring words and encouragement which so true in every marriage. Thank you and may God continuesly bless each marriage and relationship with our Creator. God bless!

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  16. I want to thank Dr Stanley for getting my lover back to me within 48 hours. When my lover left me i was so tired and frustrated till i search the internet for help and i saw so many good talk about Dr Stanley and i decided to give him a try and i contact him and explain my problems to him and he said he will cast a love spell for me which i will use to get my husband back​.To my greatest surprise within 48hours my husband came back to me from no where. If you also need his help you can contact him Via drstanleyspelltemple@hotmail.com or call +2348038139297.….

  17. There are some things that we may want to say or tell a friend and because we don't want to talk too we just you know talk about the most important detail so as to pass the message easily. This article is not one of those, I would never had thought that in all my earth years i will met a man like Obudun Magonata a spell caster who is selfless and ready to go to the dept of hell to do something to make you happy or set you free from what ever ish that you find your self. As ashamed as i am to say this i was in a blood cult group and we did all kinds of bad thing that my heart could not carry. Before i got in all they told me was that the group will connect me to all the top men in the world from political men to religious men to wealthy men and it got me all excited but they failed to let me know what the evil thing were that we were involved in and i never witness any of the bad things at the very beginning because i was still new and i hadn't taken there oat of silence. Please do not make guess or assumption about this group because i did not state any name here or country for the purpose of security. My wife knew about the group the good side about the cult just like what i knew until i took the oat of silence i was not allow to tell anyone not even my wife about our activities and at first it was cool because i frequently traveled around the world and met different ladies that i had affairs with. I was foolish i thought i own the world because i could anything that i wanted. Then for the first time in five year of my oat to commitment i witness a ritual and i was shocked. I can't say what we did but i can tell you i still see that day in my head. I witness five more of those different ritual act and then, started asking myself if i really wanted the life i had with them. I concluded that i was done but it as too late for me they said am all in already and any attempt to leave will result to my death and family. I saw myself as a dead man already because the things i saw weighed me down i had to tell someone. I told my wife hoping she will support me but she only then saw me as a monsters she left with our son. Not like i blame her, i know it was what i deserved. she left to a place i did not knew even with all my contact i could not find her because if the group had knew about it, she me and my son would have been killed. I suffered alone for three more years still with the cult group until i read about Obudun Magonata on the internet and how he has used his spell casting gift to help a lot selflessly. I contacted him with the address left on the internet told him all about my problem my wife and my cult. All he asked for, was just special materials for the spell to bring my wife back and asked me to get him to my group quarters were all the ritual happen on the day it suppose to happen. Good things being on my side, it was just a month away for the next i had to get him all the way from Africa here to were all the ritual happens. Seeing him was breathe taking his appearance was like something i can't explain in words. On the day my group was performing the ritual for the year, he walked in with all the heavy guard while all the heavily armed guard looked. He was suppose to be killed on spot don't know what he did to them. He told the group chief i was his son and i am done with the devil worship but about three of the head tried to resist in my present he made them cut their one of their arms with no word from his mouth and that was it. I left that cult and i am free from them i notice those who were in charge of watching our affairs were no longer watching me all the bug in my house they kept they came and took all out in my present. My wife is back with me again because Obudun made it happen. The day i left the group finally my wife was waiting for me at home. There she was , it seemed like she never left because she was just the way she was before i told here about me. Advise: Contact OBUDUN MAGONATA if you facing any problem his gift with nature can help solve anything at all my case is an example use this email spiritsofobudunmagonata@yahoo.com believe me or not the fact remains that i saw all his greatness with my eyes.

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